November 2, 2008
My 2008 Presidential Endorsement
Dear Friends,
As you know, tomorrow is Election Day, a day where Americans will go to the polls and cast their vote for the person that will lead our great nation for the next four years. This person will lead our nation through some very turbulent times, both economically and on the world front. These are dangerous times that we are in now. Our economy is weak and our citizens are suffering from high unemployment and the constant specter of recession hangs over us. Uncertainty in the banking industry and the stock market seems to just get worse and worse.
The world itself is a dangerous place for Americans now. Terrorists target us for their dastardly deeds and rogue nations support their efforts with both money and a steady supply of maniacs to fill their ranks. China has become our banker and can make us dance like a puppet when they tighten up our money supply. Iran, North Korea, Venezuela, Cuba, the USSR, our enemies are many. While we are at it lets not forget the good folks in the Middle East with OPEC.
Our next president is going to have to be tough, a man of action not afraid to make the hard decisions. Someone who loves our country and will surround himself with the best and brightest that will work tirelessly to bring our country back to greatness. Than is why I have decided to give my endorsement for President of the United States to a great man, a super patriot, and man who loves his God, his country, and his family……….. Ladies and gentlemen, my endorsement goes to:
Hank Hill
There are so many reasons for my endorsement of Mr. Hill for President, but I have decided to give you my top ten.
Top 10 Reasons that I have Decided to Endorse Hank Hill for President.
10. Tax Breaks for all businesses who either use or sell propane and propane accessories.
9. Don’t look for a Hill Administration to give any handouts, you either work or in President Hill’s own words, I’m Gonna Kick your ass!!!
8. As President, Hank Hill would know how to deal with third world countries. After all he’s lived next to Kahn Supanuspa for several years, and he’s from Cambodia.
7. President Hill would solve the country’s problems of illegal immigration real quick. In his own words his solution is and I quote, “Either y’all all go back to where you came from or I’m gonna kick your ass!!!”
6. Huge tax breaks for all individuals who use propane, and for those who don’t we will give them an incentive to begin. In President Hill’s own words, “Either you folks begin using propane, or I’m gonna kick your ass.”
5. President Hill would name Bill his Secretary of Defense, and if he caught a defense contractor trying to sell the government a hundred dollar hammer or a three thousand dollar toilet, to correct the problem in President Hill’s own words, either straighten out your business practices and quit trying to cheat the government, or I’m Gonna Kick your ass!!!
4. President Hill would name his wife Peggy his Secretary of Education, and her first act would be to put prayer back in school, and for any pantywaist liberal commie atheist who tried to prevent this, in President Hill’s own words, say your prayers mister, because I’m Gonna Kick your ass!!!
3. President Hill would name Boomhower as the head of the country’s United Nations Delegation, and to anyone in the UN who didn’t like it, in President Hill’s own words, “Back Off you UN America hating Commies, or I’m Gonna Kick your ass!!!
2. President Hill would keep all those tax and spend liberals in congress in line, First time they started this “Lets raise taxes so we can spend more money, he’d head over to capital hill, go before a joint session of congress, look them all in the eye, and in President Hill’s own words, “Back off those tax increases you socialists or I’m Gonna Kick your ass!!!
1. You’d be surprised how quick President Hill could deal with these rogue terrorist harboring nations. He’d call the dictator or premier or whoever ran the country into the oval office, look them in the eye, and in President Hill’s own words would say, “Either cut this terrorist stuff out or I’m Gonna Kick your ass!!!
Seriously folks, tomorrow is Election Day, don’t waste your vote by not voting!!!! I am not going to tell you who to vote for, that is for us all to decide, however I do urge you to cast your ballot. After all, if you don’t vote, you don’t have any reason to complain.
God Bless,
The Big One
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